5 Fail-Proof Ways to Know, Do, & Succeed
With each transition on our life’s journey, we have goals to achieve. As time moves on, the weeks go by, and despite our best intentions, the goal slips out of our hands. As we let it go or as we persevere, we often wonder, “Why is this so difficult?”
Why are some goals easy, difficult or seemingly impossible to achieve?
It’s the challenge of the Knowing-Doing Gap.
The Knowing-Doing Gap
Almost everyone I know, including my clients and myself, say they know how to do something, but they don’t do it; or they should stop doing something, but they don’t stop.
To make a significant change in our life, the conscious and the subconscious areas of the brain must both be engaged. The conscious, or intellectual side, identify the big goals and ideas. The sub-conscious, or emotional side, holds all our old habits and moves us into action.
For a while, you can force yourself to pursue the goal through the intellect, but it isn’t enough to sustain action; it’s too hard. The goal must have a strong emotional connection in the sub-conscious mind. Otherwise, the traps set in and the goal slips through.
Steps to Bridge the Knowing-Doing Gap
1) Get Emotionally Vested. Define the positive and negative feelings about the goal. The tougher or bigger the goal, and the more you want it, the stronger the emotional connection has to be to the outcome, which then translates to a higher success rate.
Ask yourself:
Why am I doing this
Why do I care so much about the outcome?
How badly do I want the change?
2) Plan the Work. Work the Plan. Write out the details of the plan to achieve the goal in a step by step process. For an extra measure of success, including a fail-proof plan, too, that will guide you when you have a moment that you forget, feel nervous, or lack motivation. For example, if giving up sugar, your fail-proof plan would be to include a healthy list of snacks that you can grab when you are starving.
3) Actions Speak Louder than Words. Talking may seem like action, but it isn’t. It is more like spinning your wheels. American sociologist and author, Martha Beck gives a sound exercise to gauge movement. At the beginning of the day, write a list of items to complete, including those towards your goal. At the end of the day, review the list and ask yourself, “Did I do anything that created a measurable change toward each task/goal?” If not, it’s time to change the plan and re-engage.
4) Take Risks and Beware of the Negative Pitfalls. Remember, the unknown and taking risks is uncomfortable. Remind yourself daily of your “why,” as it will help you feel more comfortable and remain focused. Don’t fall into these traps.
Move beyond the past behaviors and trials that limit your thinking.
Do not self-sabotage. Listening to the contradictory beliefs from your inside voice of ‘you can’t do this,’ are all false stories and have no business in your head, nor your heart.
Be fearless. Do not motivate yourself through fear nor become obsessed with achieving the goal. Both emotions can cause you to veer off course.
5) Stay Calm and Positive. Keep moving forward by remembering your positive outcomes and the positive emotion you will experience when you accomplish it. When anxious or scared, calm yourself with words of comfort, say authors Jeffrey Pfeffer and Robert I. Sutton, in their book, The Knowing-Doing Gap. Simply stating the following sentences sets the mind right. “It’s okay.” “You’re all right.” “There’s no rush.” “You can do this.” Believe 100% that you can do it, you deserve it, and it will be worth it.
If you find yourself fully getting the “knowing” part, but find yourself stuck in the “doing” part, reach out for support and get some help from an outside perspective. At Merrett Davies, we offer a personalized action-oriented road map that helps women achieve their goals. Contact us to schedule a consultation.
Keep going!